It's hard to enjoy romantic comedies for me as a feminist

I recently read an article Mindy Kaling wrote in 2011 titled, “Flick Chicks: A Guide to Women in the Movies”.  The article starts with Mindy admitting that her guilty pleasure is romantic comedies. She admits to suspending her disbelief in “contrived situations that occur only in the heightened world of romantic comedies” (Kaling, 2011).  Kaling and I share a love of the ridiculously contrived and implausible worlds of romantic comedies. No matter what else is on, if “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days” is on, I stop everything and allow my brain to shut off for a bit.

I enjoyed reading this article because sometimes I struggle as a feminist to watch any kind of media.  Romantic comedies are especially hard for me to enjoy the older I get and the more I learn about how society views women.  I try and comfort myself by saying, but my favorite movie is “10 Things I Hate About You” and that Kat helped to shape my own personal feminism. 

Kalings light-hearted but biting breakdown of how romantic comedies portray women has allowed me to permit myself some enjoyment again from romantic comedies.  I know that these stereotypes and portrayals of women who don’t exist in real life are harmful to society and women. Perhaps I’m looking for someone to tell me, “It’s okay to enjoy something despite the misogyny” so I can feel better about myself, I don’t know....and I'd like not to think about it too much.

The “Ethereal Weirdo” was the woman that I found most unbelievable.  The Manic Pixie Dream girl is most famously portrayed by Natalie Portman in Garden State and most of Zooey Deschanel roles. I find a lot of characteristics about this trope to be positive, these women are often self-aware and confident which I admire.  However, the fact that these (always) white and adorable women serve to make the loser-boring-mopey-cynical (always) white male feel better is troubling.  These quirky, upbeat, positive women who don’t take life too seriously would never waste their time in a relationship with these male characters.